1 – What does this person do very well? 這個人有哪些事做得很棒？
The best place to start with an -- or, in some cases, how are they right? Beginning from here, we can immediately start to see how a person has value. When you reply or make your statement to the person you’re working with, getting to the parts you agree on first is half the battle, and sets up the rest of your response to be friendly. Friendliness is an invaluable leadership skill.
2 – What can I learn from this person? 我可以從這個人身上學到什麼？
It’s a lot easier to warm to someone and recognize what they can offer when you understand what they have to teach you. Even the most difficult people or situations (perhaps especially the most difficult people or situations) have a tremendous amount of useful information that we can leverage to improve ourselves and our working environment.
3 – What is the other person’s perspective? 其他人的觀點是什麼？
For ‘what is the other person’s perspective?’, the key point is really ‘how is their viewpoint different from mine?’ Understanding the differences lets you line up what you need to say, as well as what the other person can reasonably be expected to accept, as well as get you started on the next key point in this process.
4 – What do I have in common with this person? 我跟這個人有什麼共同之處？
Giving some attention to commonality is the easiest way to find agreement, or at the very least to come to a compromise. Using words and ideas that emphasize commonality is the easiest way to help a difference of opinion to stay smooth and peaceful, influence someone’s opinion, or make allies.
5 – What is likable about this person? 這個人讓人喜歡的部分是什麼？
It’s really hard to sit down with someone you don’t even like, regardless of the good answers you might find to the other questions you can ask yourself! The other things you’ve got in mind about your situation come first. This is because they can help you find the viewpoint that will show you how to be your friendlier self. You will broaden your perspective on how someone fits into the bigger picture, improving your teamwork skills tremendously.